It’s been building for some time. You have been so unhappy, but you couldn’t put your finger on why. Maybe you’ve gone to the doctor, asked for antidepressants, tried therapy, but the unhappiness is still there.

Maybe the problem isn’t you. Maybe it’s your relationship.

You know you’ve been having problems. You seem to argue about everything. You leave the arguments exhausted, drained….and nothing has been solved. You have the same fights over and over, but your partner can’t seem to hear your side, or won’t compromise enough to work it out. Maybe you’re so tired of fighting that you’ve just stopped – stopped caring, stopped trying to communicate your side. You disappear into your work, your children, or into anything that distracts you from your unhappiness. Maybe the silence has become deafening, and the distance between you seems so wide you can’t cross it.

Or maybe there’s more. Maybe you feel trapped, claustrophobic, agitated, like you’re going to explode inside. You are isolated from your friends and family, and you’re not even sure how that happened. Nobody knows how bad it’s gotten – and sometimes you even lie to yourself about it. Your feelings are all wrong (your partner says so all the time), and you feel like you’re going crazy. Maybe your partner cuts you out of decisions, controls all the money, controls everything you do – it seems like they’re everywhere, watching your every move. Maybe they even go through your Facebook, your emails, your computer, or your phone to see who you’ve been talking to, where you’ve been, what you’ve been doing. You feel guilty, and scared, and alone.

Maybe they want more than you’re comfortable giving them sexually, and your partner sulks and complains about it all the time. They say you’re cold, cruel, withholding. They say you’re hurting them, neglecting them. They pressure you constantly. They touch you and it makes your skin crawl. Maybe they do more than that, and they pester and cajole and whine until you give in. Or maybe they force you, even if you said no with your voice or your body. You’re confused – you wonder if it’s your fault.

You try to voice your concerns, and you get scowled at, mocked, told you’re wrong, shut up, stop nagging, you’re crazy. Maybe you get shouted at, screamed at, called terrible names. Maybe you are accused of causing all the problems, of lying, of cheating. Maybe your partner even throws things, smashes things, or hits things to scare you into backing off.

Maybe they hit you. They say they are sorry, it was an accident, and it won’t happen again.

Maybe it does happen again.

Maybe you feel so alone, so confused, so neglected, that you’ve turned to someone else for comfort and support – maybe online, or maybe in person. Maybe it was just emotional support, or maybe it was more than that. But you felt a deep connection with someone else, and now you feel guilty, and confused, and torn – and suddenly your life has gotten a lot more complicated. You’re lying and keeping secrets at every turn, and it’s tearing you up inside – but you’re terrified that if you tell the truth, it will destroy your relationship, and possibly your family.

Maybe you asked, even begged, your partner to try couple’s therapy, and they refused. They aren’t the ones with the problem. They don’t trust therapists. They don’t want to talk to a stranger about private matters. It’s too expensive. It’s too much of a hassle. Or maybe you tried couple’s therapy already, and it just didn’t work.

Let us help you find yourself again, and find your best way forward.